Was it All A Dream? Cruise 2016

Credits: Photo - Anonymous, Styling - Sarah G. Schmidt, Location - Sarah G. Schmidt's home

I woke up this morning, arched my back and stretched my arms upwards like usual. I slowly pulled myself up in my crisp white bed linens that smelled slightly of saltwater and realized, wait a minute; I’m on a yacht. A YACHT. This is not usual, this is awesome! The sun was beating in through my mahogany clad bedroom cabin windows so I decided to get out of bed and get ready. This is too good. After I washed up I opened my closet and squeal. Not only was I on a yacht, I have yacht worthy wardrobe.

This was a first for me. I’m not used to waking up on a yacht. I’d like to remind you all I grew up in rural Saskatchewan. There wasn’t much opportunity for yachting between seeding and harvest season to pick up and head to the South of France.

Back to gazing at my glorious closet I wasn’t sure what my day would entail so I thought I would slip something on, go find another human and see what the day would bring. I had this Dior stunner at my disposal so pulled it over and on, wrapped a citron silk scarf over my hair pseudo pirate style and layered on some gold bangles.

I floated outside and hopscotched barefoot, obviously, my way to the upper deck and received a greeting from Goldie Hawn circa Overboard. She told me to hurry up and get myself together for our swim or what-cha-ma-call-it cove. As a grabbed a piece of rye toast from those lovely silver bread separators Goldie, true to her character, gave me the cut eye as if to say, “you’re eating carbs before a swim suit outing?” I slapped a thick glob of fresh marmalade, probably from French Polynesia, or somewhere else divine, over that slice and took a huge bite, pivoted around and scooted back to my room with that glorious closet awaiting. 

I slipped on my Chanel swim suit and pondered what to wear over it when I saw this Louis Vuitton striped blouse and hot pants combo. I slipped on some platform slides and dashed out. Back upstairs me, Kurt, Goldie and all their kids were whisked away on our smaller vessel (am I allowed to call it a dingy if I’m on yacht participant?) to what-cha-ma-call-it cove.

After a beautiful morning and afternoon, it was time to head back to our boat, pinch me, and get ready for the night’s festivities. I was told we were having cocktails on our neighbour’s boat, a billionaire real estate tycoon something or other, and then dinner and festivities at you-wouldn’t-believe-it coastal town. I washed up and went back to that closet.

Now I was torn. Would I wear this Dior tank dress? Or could I do this Chanel romper? But what about this Bottega Veneta silk pantsuit? It may get chilly tonight. After much trial and tribulation I set out in this Louis Vuitton dream dress.

As I uttered the world ‘dream’ I awoke in my home, in Calgary, and reality came crashing in quicker than I could say ahoy matey. Oh dear. This was not real. I asked myself was it really a dream? Just a fantasy? Yeah? You sure? Hmpfff.

The silver lining is while I can’t afford any of my looks above I can afford that Chanel coral lipstick.


For full Cruise/Resort 2016 coverage, check out Style.com.